Unraveling Snafus
By Pastor Jack Hayford
“I’m
writing,” I explained, “to attempt somehow to clear up the confusion
that surrounded our recent exchange notes, calls, attempts at contact,
etc.”
My
letter went on to interpret what had happened. I hoped it would
help, but I didn’t expect a cure. Hindsight explanations don’t usually
seem adequate to unravel the mind-boggling tangles two fallible
humans seem capable of at times.
In
World War II, the military coined an acronym for it—SNAFU: Situation
Normal, All Fouled Up. That’s another way of saying, “Wherever people
are involved, let’s simply adapt ourselves to the necessity of things
being messed up.”
But
that kind of “normalcy” isn’t tolerable especially in relationships.
Too many snares snag at the soul already, tearing joy and meaning
from our lives. I vote for confronting them all—and I assert that
strained, wounded, or broken relationships are primary points of
beginning if we are to be truly free.
What
to do?
As
with my letter, I suggest the following where relationships have
been “snafu-ed.” Contact—by letter, phone, or in person—might include
the following elements:
Affirm
your deep sense of value for the person involved.
All of us need to be needed. All of us are threatened with a sense
of limited worth. All of us feel misunderstood. All of us need bolstering.
It isn’t a matter of pampering or babying; it’s simply a matter
of needing to be cared about.
Request
the other person’s understanding of your own ineptness or failure.
You and I are in a stronger position when we acknowledge
our helplessness, weakness, and dependence upon the patience of
others. In doing so I am not asking people to tolerate my presumptuously
requiring them to allow me to act and remain infantile. Not
at all. But I am saying that my humanity makes for a lot of cracks
in my perfection. Rather than budding a facade, we help from patient
people in patching up the cracks in the plaster of our personalities.
Let’s ask for that help.
Be patient yourself, if your
overtures don’t receive an immediate response.
Our finest attempts have a way of bouncing back in our faces at
times. But believe me, the Holy Spirit can bless the spirit
of your approach even beyond what your words can do. The fact
of your attempt provides grounds for His ongoing working.
Don’t
succumb to the flesh-thought, I’d better leave well enough alone.
“Snafu” isn’t “well enough.” Unraveling, like a child’s spaghettied
shoelaces, often takes time and patience.
Join me, won’t you? With our Lord’s help, SNAFU could
mean, “Situation Normal, All Fixed Up.”
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Jack
Hayford Ministries
14800 Sherman Way, Van Nuys, CA 91405-2233